Driving 101

I've been doing quite a bit of traveling lately and, quite frankly, I think it is time many of my fellow drivers take a look at the old driver's manual again.  Now, I should preface by saying everyone has an off day now and again.  We can all recall, usually with a wince, a near-miss or two that would have fallen squarely on our own shoulders in the guilt column. 

Having said that, there are a few matters of driving etiquette I'd like to discuss.

1. Red Lights.  Folks, these are NOT suggestions.  Nor are STOP signs.  Do I really need to tell you why barrelling through a light after it has turned red is a bad idea?  We all have the occasional "it was yellow when I started under it" moment, but that really should be a rare occurrence if you're actually paying attention.
2. Blinkers.  I don't get the general aversion to using blinkers.  Perhaps people just don't like feeling as if they are required to communicate with perfect strangers?  I don't know.  I can only say that there are few driving peccadilloes that annoy me like people suddenly jamming on their breaks in the middle of traffic to take a left turn I didn't know they were about to execute.  For those of you who really have an issue with your blinkers, I have a suggestion: use your middle finger to tap it up or down and tell yourself you're flipping me off on the sly.  You'll feel like you told me off; I'll know what you're doing on the road; and we'll both be happy!
3. Tailgating.  Riding the bumper of my Subaru will NOT make me drive faster.  It will, however, make me stubborn.  As for flashing your highs while riding my butt . . . I am more likely to get beside some big tractor trailer truck and park there than to speed up . . . especially if my kids aren't in the car.  (I don't risk road rage with my kids for anything.)  Just be patient.  I'll move over when I get the chance.  I promise!
4. Driving over 80 mph.  Unless your wife is in labor and about to start pushing or you wear a badge, plus 80 is just plain ridiculous.  Out in Nevada where there's nothing for miles, maybe.  In Rhode Island?  Give me a break.  And in a Honda nonetheless? 
5. Motorcycles.  I like motorcycles.  I grew up riding my dad's old Honda Trail 70, and I never felt cooler than zipping around the farm as fast as I could without spilling.  (Or faster than I could without spilling, as the case may be!)  It behooves all drivers to be aware that motorcycles can easily get lost in a blind spot and to keep an eye peeled for them at all times.  HOWEVER, a motorcyclist riding up the breakdown lane and weaving in and out of traffic at speeds in excess of 80 mph (see number 4 above) while wearing cutoff shorts, sandals, and a tank top (without a helmet!) CANNOT blame the poor driver who hits him.  Respect goes both ways.  (No, I have NEVER hit a motorcyclist!  I pray to God I never do!  Biggest driving fear next to hitting a child on a bike or a skateboard.)  
6. The Horn.  I like my horn.  A lot.  I use it to say goodbye to my kids when I leave them with a sitter.  I use it to say hello to my friends when I drive by their houses.  I have even used it on a flock of arrogant geese who refused to let me out of a farmyard.  I do NOT use it to tell someone to drive when they are stuck at a red light (see number 1 above) . . . or behind a person turning left on a busy road . . . or because I've had a bad day and feel the need to take it out on someone I don't know.  We're all doing our best out there.  Unless someone is in danger of crashing into you or someone else, take it easy on that thing in the steering wheel.  
7. Blue lights.  I admit they look cool, but they KILL my eyes!  Unless you're a police officer, I just don't get the need for them.  
8. Waving people through.  This is a tough one, because I admit to appreciating a wave-on when trying to get out of Dunkin' Donuts at coffee hour.  However, I have also been tail-ended when someone in front of me waved someone out and the person behind me didn't notice.  In addition, I've had well-meaning Samaritans try waving me into oncoming traffic and then blare their horn at me (see number 6 above) when I neglected to take the bait and become responsible for being broadsided.  In most cases, just keep driving.  I'll get out eventually. 

So there you have it, the big things that make me crazy when driving.  I won't swear at you.  I won't flip you the middle finger, even when using my blinker.  I may toss you a business card with my blog address and this post highlighted on it! 

Drive Safely!